Showing posts with label Pre-teens. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pre-teens. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Our Social Media Sabbatical


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | Our Social Media Sabbatical
I don't profess to be the perfect parent. Although I may at times make the mistake of striving for perfection, I often fall pretty short in the parenting stakes. Generally if I fall short, I always try and get up, dust myself off and learn whatever lessons there are to be learned. Then I come here and share these lessons with whoever wants to listen. (Or I eat a block of chocolate - whatever gives the most satisfaction). I certainly don't declare what parenting path I choose to be the best way or the right way but it's just... well, my way.

This post is perhaps one of those lessons I'm choosing to share - whether I'm right or wrong in my approach only time will tell.

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Parenting Teen Girls - An Evening With Michael Carr-Gregg


IMAGE:THE MOTHER LOAD | Michael Carr-Gregg
The further along I travel on my journey as a parent, the more I suspect that firstly the learning curve is getting steeper as the years rush by and secondly that I may well be monumentally screwing things up and no one is coming out and telling me honestly. I often balance precariously on the verge of feeling as though each parenting strategy I adopt might be the right one, and probably feels appropriate but then again I half-expect any possible dire consequences of my strategy to hit me suddenly, teach me that well-needed lesson and remind me of just how badly I'm doing. So mostly for me, it's a confidence game coupled with my somewhat unrealistic desire for parenting perfection. Oh what a fun mum I must be! With these various insecurities in mind, I have always found the advice and wisdom of others vitally important on this parenting journey. This seems especially true now as we head into the challenging adolescent years, aiming to raise well-balanced people who at the end of their teen journey still have some level of respect for you as their trusted parent and indeed for themselves.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

The Five Minute Chat....


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD
Every night at bedtime, my ten year old girl asks me the same question. "Mum, can we have a five minute chat?".

This is her way of telling me she needs me to herself for a period of time, without the distraction of homework, electronic devices, chores and most importantly without her doting five year old sister skipping around us like a chihuahua on Red Bull. Truth be told, sometimes it's also a great way for her to delay the orders for sleep but I figure I owe her a little one-on-one given that most of her spare time usually belongs to her sister. And what better way to learn about what is actually taking place inside her world than to spend time talking and listening to her without distraction? It's amazing how much insight I'm able to gain when she's in the mood for conversation. This is where the usual ritual on the drive home from school where I say "What did you do at school today?" and she replies, "Nothing much" is finally abandoned and the real details come spilling out.

The five minute chat originated about a year ago when Miss O was entering a new phase of her life where friendships suddenly became complicated.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

One Chapter Ends, Another Begins....Ten Years Today!

IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | One Chapter Ends, Another Begins

Some would argue that this post is a little self - indulgent, however I figure it's my blog and I'll post if I want to...! (Yeah - I'm so badass).

Ten years ago today, we entered that special club known as 'parenthood' for the first time. We knew NOTHING about our new role and to this day, I'm not sure that we know much more other than how awesome our kids seem to be turning out, despite our often clumsy parenting efforts.

This girl is one of the best people around and today she opens a new chapter in her life, leaving behind her baby, toddler, pre-schooler and little girl self. Happy Birthday to our big girl! May the next chapter bring you much happiness, new discoveries, many meaningful life long friendships and minimal teenage conflict with your parents.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Social Media Manners - What's Your Code Of Conduct?


IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | Social Media Manners
I was reading a post on an Australian parenting forum recently, where a mother was asking for advice on what you would do if a photo of your child appeared on Facebook (or similar) without your knowledge or consent. The mother was rightly pissed off and had only found out about it when someone commented that they'd seen the picture online and remarked on how much her daughter had grown up. The photo was neither dodgy or suggestive, but her dilemma was that she felt a little violated and unsure about whether she should ask the sharing mother to take the post down. Furthermore, she was interested in what the 'rules' are regarding social media manners given her permission had not been sought. Seems like a pretty clear cut case of thoughtlessness to me but it got me thinking about online etiquette and how grey the line obviously is for some people.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Emotional Terrorists? Girls, Friendship and Everything In Between


IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | Emotional Terrorists?
I've come to realise that as you get older, although friendships can often diminish in number, they tend to become much more meaningful and fulfilling. When you're in your teens, all going well you have a handful of great friends with whom your main aim in life is to have as much fun as possible. This usually involves experimenting in whatever peer-driven activity is on the cards irrespective of its level of propriety. In your twenties, if you have a great job, or you go to university, the people you meet here often become your 'circle'. I've worked with some awesome people in my time and still consider them to be some of my dearest (and funniest) friends who I love to reunite with as often as possible. 

In the next phase of your life if you have children, the bonds you form with new found friends from other parent groups i.e. a mother's group, kinder and school become some of the easiest, most meaningful friendships of your life due largely to your adult level of maturity and because of the common interests and challenges you share as parents.  So it's at that time once your own friendships are at their easiest and most fulfilling that you become aware of the challenges faced by your kids as they enter the same friendship phases you survived all those years ago.

Monday, September 23, 2013

Save Us From The 'Selfie' - When Innocent Becomes Suggestive


IMAGES : MORGUEFILE.COM | Save Us From The Selfie

It's a subject that's been playing on my mind lately, particularly as I watch my first born child heading towards her teen years like a clumsy snowball barrelling down a hill. Perhaps it's because we sat as a family and watched old videos of her as a toddler this past weekend, or simply due to the fact that her newly discovered sometimes surly teen-like attitude is belting me over the head as a reminder that my firm, motherly grasp is gently loosening. Either way, I need to give further consideration to this especially tricky subject that all parents face thanks to the wonders of technology and connectivity.  I am of course referring to the modern age artistic phenomenon of the 'selfie'. For those still living in 1980 or with their head buried in the sand (any room there for me?) a 'selfie' is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as follows:

Selfie
noun
(plural selfies)

informal, a photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam and uploaded to a social media website.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Taming The Beast - Social Media And Pre Teens



IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | Taming The Beast


Social media: the means of interactions among people in which they create, share, and exchange information and ideas in virtual communities and networks.[1] (Wikipedia)

 Sounds harmless enough, doesn't it? Sounds almost necessary and educational according to the above definition.

As a parent, if I was asked to visually define social media, the first thing that comes to mind is an enormous, towering transformer - like beast, casting a large dark shadow, complete with heavy doors which open and close allowing only the brave to enter, loudly slamming shut behind them. Okay - I concede it's a little dramatic but despite my own familiarity and understanding of said beast, I feel as though I need to go back to seeing it as something new and fearful in order for me to navigate it as a parent of an almost ten year old girl who in the coming years will will commence her journey into the online space. I may not like it, but it's going to happen unless the internet blows up so I figure I might as well do it correctly, right?