Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The Status Of Childbirth (My Media Bugbear)

IMAGE : KATE, WILLS AND GEORGE - BLESS 'EM | The Status Of Childbirth

Let it be said that I love Kate and Wills and new baby George. I love what they stand for in these modern times and good on 'em for announcing that they'll be doing the hands on parent thing (although I'll bet my left ovary that Mary Poppins will be called upon before too long because why wouldn't you after a string of sleepless nights if you had the choice?).

Perhaps I'm being over-sensitive (and I do write this post with my tongue pressed gingerly into my cheek) but does anyone else find the above statement accompanying the photo slightly pointless and a teeny bit insulting? 

It is a story today on leading parenting website and it kinda takes me aback because what it says to me, (having had two of the the most uncontrollable, interventionalist childbirth experiences known to man) is that somehow if you've managed to extricate another human being from your nether regions without any assistance or relief, you're nothing short of a warrior or hero and deserve to be held in higher regard than those who have not. Truth be told, you ARE a warrior and I will tell you so many times over if the chance arises but I don't need to be publicly reminded of the fact that somehow I'm not in the same superior category for 'giving in' to drugs and relief! Let me tell you, I damn well felt like a warrior when they finally handed me my children across the sheet of an operating table - the fact that all of us survived the event at all makes me feel as though by my standards, I should be knighted!

Predictably, I'm sure the next thing I'll read on the same website (and others in the same genre) will be that Mothers should stop judging each other as we're all equals and should be treated so. I wonder if they realise that articles like the above are not necessarily supporting that non-judgy sentiment given the amount of guilt and anguish some women go through (often obsessively) if the birth of their child doesn't go according to their well considered plan?

Anyway, glad to have that off my chest.


  1. Totally agree Mother, I hate all this crap.

    I do feel like a freaking warrior for giving birth twice "naturally", but in one of those instances it was a matter of literally minutes between natural birth and emergency c-section, and entirely out of my hands.

    I still would have been a warrior, but perhaps would have felt less so because of some strange sense of failure (failing at what, I ask myself!!).

    Breastfeeding is the same. I feel like a total hero for breast feeding both my kids to 12months plus, but that in no way means I look down upon women who (for an absolute myriad of reasons that I will never be privy to) may have opted for other means.

    The bottle is not wrong or less, the c-sec is not wrong or less and talking about these issue in these ways helps no-one.


    1. Beautifully put, OSL. I was forced to give up breastfeeding much sooner than I wanted to for medical reasons and I swear that guilt and failure consumed me for much longer than it should have.

      The 'Motherhood Expectation' is crippling and the media's ability to twist the knife on occasion is cruel.