Thursday, June 26, 2014

How It All Goes Down In My Head (A Blog Hop About The Writing Process)


IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | A Blog Hop
I've been invited to participate in a 'blog hop' by my dear friend and fellow blogger Kate from One Small Life - how cool is that? A blog hop is a bit like the old fashioned chain letter but without the annoying need for stamps or for your mum to ring someone else's Mum and let them know you're not allowed to participate because you have too much homework.

Kate has asked me to write a post about my own writing process. You should read hers here; it's an excellent piece, as are all her posts over at One Small Life. She has set the bar very high on the subject of personal writing, nonetheless, here's my take on our shared passion.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

To See Or Not To See? (I Really Don't Want to Talk About It, Thanks)


IMAGE : WWW.EYECHARTMAKER.COM | To See Or Not To See?

I witnessed the most Oscar-winning performance from Miss A at her first routine eye test last week.

I should have known. I should have been more switched on given she was broadcasting to everyone with great excitement even before the big appointment, that she was "definitely" getting a pair of pink glasses. While I know she can be pretty convincing when it comes to getting her way, I certainly didn't expect the performance she put on for the lovely optometrist who was thankfully able to see through A's dramatic interpretation of  'Stevie Wonder - The Early Years'.

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Judy Blume - Thirty Years On


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | Judy Blume Thirty Years On
If you're a child of the 1980's you'll probably remember these books (although they look a bit different now).

I loved Judy Blume books. They introduced a 'tweenage' me to all kinds of concepts such as self esteem, bullying, body image, friendships, the beginning of adolescence and the realities of life generally. I felt so grown up reading them; Margaret became a kindred spirit and I learnt that Sheila the Great was simply a misunderstood and frightened know-it-all.

My ten year old girl adores reading. Her head is always in a novel of some sort and it occurred to me recently that she's now at an age that she might really enjoy the Judy Blume series, just as I did. I've purchased a few of the books relevant to her age bracket but I might leave 'Forever' alone for a while - I don't think we're quite ready for the boy/girl relationship business (!).

Sunday, May 25, 2014

That's A Wrap On Another Mother Of A Week!


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | A Mother Of A Week

It's Sunday - finally. I love a good Sunday.

I'm parked firmly arse-down on the couch today in front of a humming gas log fire while two kids make a well worn path between the TV and the pantry still wearing their standard weekend uniform; pyjamas. It's pretty loose around here on a Sunday when there are no plans. Laziness is generally acceptable, TV is permitted and no one has to brush their hair until evening bath time, me included.

This week was crazy...!

Monday, May 19, 2014

Resilience, Rainbows And Other Ramblings


IMAGE : PIXAR 'Boundin' | Resilience
WARNING : MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS. 

I seem to spend a lot of time talking to my girls about resilience. 

Resilience is pretty much defined as having the ability to cope with, and bounce back from life's speed humps, big or small. Some kids are naturally more resilient than others (I suspect environment plays a role in their ability to cope) and some kids need to be taught. Not surprisingly, mine fall squarely into the latter category. Even as I type, Miss A (five) is snivelling uncontrollably because Miss O (ten) doesn't want to play Minecraft with her. Her tears, heartbreak and lack of acceptance of this momentary rejection demonstrates pretty clearly that we have a lot of work to do in regard to her resilience but then again, she's five so no great surprises there.

Friday, May 9, 2014

Life And Its Lemons.....


IMAGE : PINTEREST.COM | Life And Its Lemons
You know the famous expression, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade"..? 

Well as it turns out, sometimes life doesn't just hand them to you. Sometimes they are literally hurled at you and often at the most unexpected times. 

Sometimes, you can catch them one by one and immediately engage the appropriate response by simply adding a little positivity and sweetness to create the proverbial lemonade. But at other times, the lemons are really big ones and they come at you like a giant landslide and engulf you because you had your back turned, comfortably believing in your own immunity to such things. I guess we're not immune though, are we? Doesn't matter how much of a fine upstanding citizen we are, no matter how much we consider others, give back to the community or even how many times we politely give way in traffic, the lemons are neither sympathetic nor selective and they can find us at any given moment.

Thursday, May 8, 2014

I Do WHAT????

IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD
At the school Mother's Day breakfast this morning, a video was shown of the Preps discussing what they think their Mums do while they're at school.  I was absent from the event but apparently Miss A in her usual unpredictable fashion declared to the 200 odd guests that, "when I'm at school, my Mummy shops for toothbrushes for herself".

Seriously? I swear, I'm going to make sure her 21st speech is the definition of embarrassing - REVENGE WILL BE MINE!!

(And for the record, while I DO support a healthy dental regime, I DO NOT shop for toothbrushes on a daily basis. Special thanks to the multitude of school mums who checked this fact with me this morning!).

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

The Five Minute Chat....


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD
Every night at bedtime, my ten year old girl asks me the same question. "Mum, can we have a five minute chat?".

This is her way of telling me she needs me to herself for a period of time, without the distraction of homework, electronic devices, chores and most importantly without her doting five year old sister skipping around us like a chihuahua on Red Bull. Truth be told, sometimes it's also a great way for her to delay the orders for sleep but I figure I owe her a little one-on-one given that most of her spare time usually belongs to her sister. And what better way to learn about what is actually taking place inside her world than to spend time talking and listening to her without distraction? It's amazing how much insight I'm able to gain when she's in the mood for conversation. This is where the usual ritual on the drive home from school where I say "What did you do at school today?" and she replies, "Nothing much" is finally abandoned and the real details come spilling out.

The five minute chat originated about a year ago when Miss O was entering a new phase of her life where friendships suddenly became complicated.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Finding A Voice - A Year In The Making


IMAGE : VOICESOF2014.COM.AU
I've never been very good at reaching goals. I LOVE to set them; I love listing them in lovely neat handwriting, I love imagining the steps I will take in order to reach them and then visualising myself atop the metaphorical podium accepting whatever accolades are associated with the end result. (I recall with fondness my Olympic dressage circa 1985 goal which sadly was not to be thanks primarily to a distinct lack of talent from both me and my humble steed).

When it comes to goals, I'm not often one to follow through and do the hard yards regardless of the usual impediments and challenges associated with reaching success. Either the life has gotten in the way, the goals are often just too Mount Everest-like for me to reach, or I'm just plain lazy and I lose interest with a loudly declared *yawn* as I fall back onto the couch. Indeed, my consistent failure is the result of all three in most cases.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

The Happy Delusions Of A Holiday...


IMAGES : THE MOTHER LOAD | The Happy Delusions Of A Holiday


How good are school holidays when you actually get to go somewhere?!

We're home from a long overdue family trip to one of our favourite places, Noosa.

(Or 'Noooooisa' if you're a bit of a hoity toity).

Noosa! The place where you check your Melbourne blacks in at the door, head straight for the nearest bathing suit store and purchase the brightest, happiest, most overpriced beach dress you can find followed immediately by a stop at the pharmacy for a vat of tan in a tub.  Hooray! Holidays!

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Go the FLECK To Sleep ...(Please)


KIDS PLEASE DO MORE OF THIS | Go The F@ck To Sleep
IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD
See this face? Looks like an angel doesn't she!? But do you know what we've gone through in order to get her to reach this blissful state? DO YOU!? Our nightly sleep routine is officially making me crazy. Night after night, it's like someone sounds a magic trumpet and the two tired, irritable souls who roam the hallways in full whinge mode between 4-7pm suddenly come to life like feral night cats. Apparently, it's party time and we're all invited!

Our nightly repertoire usually commences with such favourites as "Mum! I need water!" followed two minutes later by "I (think) I need the toilet" (for the twelfth time). Then there's the "I'm hot - I need my fan" or "I'm cold I need a blanket" and let's not forget last night's classic, "Mum! I need to tell you that I've learned to click my fingers!!!! Can you hear that?? I'm doing it!!" Snap, snap, snap. Truthfully, I can't work out if it's her fingers making the sound, or my unusually tense shoulder tendons coming undone, one by one.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Gerdi And Her Friends...

IMAGE : ALBERT BREDENHANN  | Gerdi And Her Friends



I watched a beautiful video recently based upon the woman above, Gerdi McKenna. Have you seen it? If not, you can watch it here. In the video, Gerdi's friends get together for a special photo shoot to support her through a recent breast cancer diagnosis. I don't share this as lightly as I do most other things, because there are many raw nerves attached to a cancer story; especially amongst the regular readers here.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Byte For A Bite - How's YOUR Week Been?


IMAGE : PINTEREST.COM | Byte For A Bite
Hello Melbourne, I see your weird and freaky weather is back for another season? I'd say welcome but I'm currently busy removing the thermal puffer jacket to reveal further unnecessary layers of clothing that require urgent disposal whilst madly trying to apply 50+ now that the sun is suddenly searing my face. 

What's happening in your world this week? I'm feeling chatty today; chatty in a desperate need to be distracted from work kinda way which means that when I launch into 'Mother Load' mode and away from 'work' mode, my pay packet decreases considerably (read as entirely). Still, here I am - perhaps I'll endeavour to re-arrange my priorities next week.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Tree Change, Sea Change or Me Change?


IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | Tree Change, Sea Change Or Me Change?
You know what I would like to do right now? I would like to do a big crazy life change that gets me as far away as possible from the daily grind that currently engulfs me. Call it a moment of temporary insanity or an early (not that early) mid-life crisis but I have a sudden yearning for a big, beautiful, spacious house with enough land for horses, and swing sets, a view of rolling hills and maybe a lake. See the picture? I want that driveway. And I want big verandahs, and a country kitchen in which to bake bread - I want to take up bread making! Yes! Why not? Know what else I'd like? I would simply like to put a stop to the 'groundhog day' monotony that currently defines my world. Is that too much to ask?


Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Para'Kito - Au Revoir, Moustique! (French for Later, Mozzie)


PARA'KITO PRODUCTS


FREE PRODUCT REVIEW: Does anyone else have kids who are so attractive to mosquitoes that they resemble victims of the Ebola virus after an evening outside during summer? I do. They blow up like a couple of puffer fish, scratch themselves stupid until we've bled, cried and 'tantrumed' our way to recovery (me included). If I dare lather them in the usual chemical repellents to prevent the bites in first place, I'm fairly confident that it's their constant sneezing and loud whingeing about the smell that deters the mozzies and not the repellent itself.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Media Hypocrisy - Charlotte Vs. Grant


IMAGE : NEWS.COM.AU
I'm disappointed in the media hypocrisy this week.

On one hand, the overwhelming media message after the death of Charlotte Dawson is all about being nicer, kinder, more accountable and more supportive of those who are vulnerable. Yet two days later, here are photos and an invasive story with 'judgey' undertones about Grant Hackett (equally as mentally vulnerable as Charlotte I would argue) in a complete flap after his child goes missing from his hotel room.

Yep - his unfortunate choice of outfit might win him first prize at a questionable toga party, but wouldn't it be weirder if he'd taken the time to dress appropriately before searching for his missing child at 3am? Did onlookers expect a suit and tie under such circumstances? Good on him for considering his child first before worrying about the ass clowns who take these photos for sport in the first place.

And if you've never had one of those moments where you've lost sight of your child, I applaud you and bow down before you; your time will probably come. It happens to the best of us so there's no judgement here.

Dear Media - you are part of the problem, not the solution.


Sunday, February 23, 2014

For Charlotte - Engaging Our Social Responsibility


IMAGE : PINTEREST.COM | For Charlotte Dawson

Yesterday the news broke that a well known Australian TV personality had taken her own life as a result of depression. Reports suggest that although she was predisposed to the condition to a degree, her depression had often been fuelled by cruel and vile taunts on social media in recent years, prompting a previously unsuccessful attempt at her own life in 2012.  While I didn't know Charlotte Dawson personally and didn't pay much attention to her public achievements, I took notice when Twitter erupted against her a couple of years ago and witnessed the very public, downwards spiral she suffered and subsequently fought hard to overcome. Today, I have a pang of sadness for someone I never met and a strange sense of social responsibility for her fragile state given the social media cesspool we've all been happily swimming in and tolerating over the past few years.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Gripping Too Tight (And Other Nonsense)


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | Gripping Too Tight And Other Nonsense

Righto - I think I have a problem. Actually, I KNOW I have a problem and it's much more about me than her but nonetheless, here it is.

Remember I said that Miss A was positively brimming with excitement at the prospect of commencing her first year of school?  Well the enthusiasm seems to have evaporated somewhat and my obsessive, everything-must-be-perfect personality is having trouble dealing. I'm not having trouble in a shouty, impatient mother kinda way (I reserve that part of my personality for other precious moments like when it takes what seems like ten minutes to climb into the car and fasten a godforsaken seat belt) but in a begging, "oh please please love school, it's so much fun" kinda way.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

'Having It All' - A Society Standard Gone Wrong?



IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | Having It All
New title for me - gym junkie. Look at me go!

Actually, no not really - I'm lying. I'm there by the skin of my teeth and if ANYONE was to utter the sentence "Free for a coffee?" at school drop off, the gym would be ditched quicker than Kim Kardashian's ex-husband. Nonetheless, I was there this morning and as I clumsily did my fifteen minute Cliff Young-esque shuffle, I was drawn to a segment on Mornings featuring a panel of guests including the lovely and wise Lisa Wilkinson. I always tend to agree with EVERYTHING Lisa says and even though she was muted by the gym's annoyingly loud 80's megamix (granted, agreement with Ms. Wilkinson was a little more challenging without sound) today was no exception.

The crux of the segment seemed to be about how Jennifer Aniston is portrayed by the media to be downtrodden and sad because although she is defined as 'successful', she hasn't yet fulfilled some society-assumed standard goal of having children and therefore she has supposedly failed to reach the top of the 'having it all' pyramid.  This got me (and the panel) thinking:

How do we really know Jen's own personal definition of 'having it all'

How do we as women personally define 'having it all' for ourselves?

What IS the 'all', and more importantly, WHY does it seem to be the pinnacle of living your best life? 


My immediate thought while watching the segment, was that everyone's definition of 'having it all' is different so why does the media in particular seem to have one set of definitions for us to aim for, especially as women?  As Lisa so wisely put it, the 'having it all' standard is like an "albatross around women's necks". I dare say the successful career, the bikini body, money, a happy relationship and kids probably doesn't apply to as many people as the average gossip mag would suggest. Surely we're all aiming for different things in different stages of our lives? Some women might be perfectly happy to be on their own, without children. Some might prefer to live a simple life where possessions are an unnecessary burden.  God forbid, perhaps some of us are aiming for more spiritual fulfilment, or even for the fulfilment of others? I'll admit that in my twenties, my definition of 'having it all' was sometimes about appearance and often a little materialistic - hard to admit but there it is. Nowadays however, 'having it all' for me is simply about health and happiness - not just for myself, but also for the people I love. I don't need the bikini body to feel fulfilled, I simply need enough money to cover the essentials, and my family balance takes precedence over the success of my career, without exception.

In the somewhat shallow assumption that we're all aiming for the same 'having it all' criteria, while watching the segment I immediately gave thought to women around the world, and the lunacy of the expression 'having it all' in countries where people are focusing less on their bikini body and more upon the day to day survival of their children or themselves. I mean really - if I was to discuss my own societal definition of 'having it all' with a mother living her life in the Congo or Syria for instance, my priorities over hers would seem utterly ridiculous wouldn't they? With that in mind then, what would the world standard of 'having it all' for women be?

I think we should encourage the media and perhaps society as a whole to choose a healthier set of guidelines when it comes to people (in particular women) living their best life, by their own standards. Perhaps 'having it all' should be more suitably defined as 'being your all' - that would sit much more comfortably with most of the women I know. 



Tuesday, January 28, 2014

The Mummy Mafia - Why It's Not All Bad


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | The Mummy Mafia - Why It's Not All Bad
Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one. ― C.S. Lewis

Last week, I read an interesting article written by Em Rusciano via Mamamia titled, 'Why I'm Not Friends With Other Mothers' and it really struck a chord with me.  In actual fact, it made me feel quite sad and sorry for her;  I'm sure that's not the reaction she was after as its tone was quite self-effacing, but it made me realise that I truly can't imagine being without the friends I've made through our school community and through my children generally. In the case of the article, I am the complete opposite to Em; these days I definitely have more girlfriends with children than without. That's kinda normal though, right?? When it comes to schoolyard friendships, apparently not.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

2014 - A Snapshot So Far

*This post looks like a baboon's bum when viewed on mobile due to images - best viewed on your desktop!*

How has your 2014 been so far? Are you getting a handle on what sort of year you're going to have yet? I've been hoping for a peaceful and steady one with plenty of happiness and a little predictability;  I'm not yet convinced it's going to be that way but gimme a few more weeks to assess and I'll get back to you (you know I will!).

I recently read a post by the fabulous Styling You who completed the list below and invited her readers to do the same, so I thought I'd give it a go. If you're into it, why not try it yourself?  Thanks also to Pip from Meet Me At Mikes for the original inspiration - it was fun and thought-provoking.


So far in 2014, I'm:

Monday, January 20, 2014

One Year On! (And Other Cliché Headings)

IMAGE : MORGUEFILE.COM | One Year On!

So this week marks one year since I shared The Mother Load Australia blog for the very first time. *insert proud, overbearing stage mother face here*.

Back then, I set myself a little writing-a-blog goal and although the sharing was the most uncomfortable bit (yes - hard to believe at this point, right?), the response has definitely been the most rewarding part of the journey. Not in my widest dreams did I imagine that people would take the time to read, comment and share with their friends, the thoughts I randomly transfer from my scrambled brain onto the page with my usual irregularity and lack of planning. I still cringe with a small sense of embarrassment when I consider the concept of having an 'audience', but that is far outweighed by the privilege of getting a response every time I write.  What a rush.

I've had such a blast writing my ramblings, meeting other bloggers, learning how to do it better and seeing the audience grow. The most fun bit for me is that The Mother Load Facebook page is heading towards 200 followers - that's nearly 200 people who are happy for me to appear in their Facebook feed on an ongoing basis which is kinda mind-blowing and awesome. Thanks to all of you for taking the time to comment, 'like' stuff and share;  I'm certain the goal would have died a long time ago without the encouragement and accountability of all of you (because half arsed, unfinished goals are also a passion of mine it seems).

Anyway, here's to the year ahead. The Mother Load Australia will continue in 2014 and my new goal is to see it evolve, continue to do it better and hopefully entertain with more ramblings of parenthood, instinct, opinion, occasional wisdom and more than a little dysfunction.

S. x


Saturday, January 11, 2014

Life B.C. - A Little Stroll Down Memory Lane


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | Life B.C - A Little Stroll Down Memory Lane

I'm a Mum of two girls and I love it. Let's be clear - I barely remember the person I was before our two junior family members entered my life; frankly, I don't really miss the person I was and I wouldn't change things for the world.  Yada yada yada.  

Having cleared that up, let it be said there's a decent sized list of stuff I miss about my life B.C. (Before Children). Call me a questionable mother for publicly listing them but dammit, sometimes a mother has to reminisce.  Remember the freedom you took for granted before children? No? Perhaps my stroll down memory lane will help jog your memory!

Let's start with spontaneity. That's officially the first thing you toss in the skip as you leave the hospital with your new bundle of joy. It never returns and you barely have time to mourn its absence. To this very day, I miss the ability to go somewhere fabulous without great consideration for a) whether appropriate behaviour from the junior attendees will be likely b) what will be required to accompany us in order to maintain said appropriate behaviour c) whether the potential for trouble outweighs the need to go out all and therefore should the plan be aborted for sanity's sake. These factors come into each and every outing decision you make. Spontaneity is awesome and if you still have it, use it! Or come around to my place and look after my kids while I use it for you. 

Another thing is eating out in a grown up, civilised manner. That's something I REALLY miss. The simple task of going somewhere nice, spending time pouring over a menu or wine list with mature, ponderous conversation and eating as slowly as biologically required, without what I'm calling 'parental indigestion'. If you have kids, you already know what I mean. 'Parental indigestion' is usually accompanied by phrases such as "sit down and eat - we're in a (bloody) restaurant" or "for the love of God, pass me four thousand napkins while I clean up the tidal wave of iced water that has just ended up destroying my Pad Thai". Yeah - that. I miss eating out without the usual knot in my stomach. 

Then there's grocery shopping. Although I was never one for pacing the aisles of Coles for hours in a leisurely fashion, there are now times I'd pay good money for the ability to do it. Lock me in there for a night - please. I'll pay for everything I eat, just give me the peace. Remember the days of doing every aisle and carefully comparing prices and specials? Remember ending up at the checkout with a trolley full of the items you chose with clear and concise precision and not peppered with random rolls of sticky tape, confectionery and cheap-arse toys that you have no memory of collecting on your journey?  I also sigh despondently at the wonderful memory of not caring who else was in the supermarket, knowing full well that back in the day, you alone would never have asked the large lady if she has a baby in her tummy, or referring loudly to the Sri Lankan Nun as "Blackface". Before kids, I was able to control how to prevent embarrassment and the dishing out of insults, as I saw fit. Those were the days.

Lastly, who remembers a visit to the Doctor before kids? Oh, I do. Sooo many things to remember and miss - how about a calm, predictable waiting room experience?! Remember not caring about whether there was a sufficient array of colouring pencils to keep your entourage entertained while you're trapped in a room with a bunch of hacking strangers for an unnecessarily lengthy period of time? Remember also not having to worry about using the term 'inside voice' in every third sentence in that same waiting room? Recently, I was lucky enough to have a four year old with me when going for my routine pap test. Yes, hooray - a pap test. I'd struck the proverbial jackpot one would say. I had meticulously booked the appointment so I could attend on my own, but naturally at the last minute the babysitting fell through and I was forced to drag Miss 4 along with me. For the love of God, if this ever happens to you, simply concede, cancel the appointment and happily pay the penalty fees in the knowledge you've avoided experiencing the highest level of parental punishment possible. I'll spare you the details but needless to say, the doctor recommended I attend again the following week for a repeat test due to her "not being certain I was relaxed enough. Really? Quelle surprise!! And who doesn't love enduring a pap test two weeks in a row?

So there's the mere beginning of the 'Life B.C'. list. I admit that conversely there's a really sizeable list detailing how much better my life is with these small people in it and how lucky I am to have been able to have them in the first place, but sometimes it feels good to remember the good old B.C. days even just for a minute!

Now excuse me while I go and wipe the smeared breakfast jam from my new, overpriced dress...




Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Welcome 2014 - Are You Diving In Or Are You Treading Lightly?


IMAGE : THE MOTHER LOAD | Welcome 2014

Happy New Year! How did you ring in 2014? Did you welcome it with wide open arms, great gusto and copious amounts of champagne?  We did it small but laughed until our stomachs ached - hopefully it's a sign of things to come this year.  Quite amazingly, I made it to midnight! I learned that if you say enough times that you have no intention of getting there, you seem to have a greater chance of reaching it without realising. Miraculous. In other news, I managed to have kids in bed by 10.30pm which in itself is monumental and perhaps a little cruel on NYE but holiday exhaustion had officially set in so they were ushered to bed without a huge amount of argument. Again, miraculous.

So farewell, 2013.